Cut to Scene 2: You Put Transmission Fluid Where? Dude, it’s time to run.

Cut to Scene 2: You Put Transmission Fluid Where? Dude, it’s time to run.

Friday, August 04, 2017

Bringing You Up To Speed

Boyfriend – as in man, male, guy, dude – decided I was “a girl” and wasn’t smart enough to put oil in my 1989 Chevy Z24 so “the man” better handle it.” Cut to scene 2 and I’m standing there trying to comprehend – “You put transmission fluid where?”

I’ll admit, I was a tad nervous and so excited I felt my southern redneck girl creep out. Before I knew it, it was all I could do to keep my calm. Then there was that awkwardness you feel because you’re not use to how the pedal responds; and the feel of that sound coming out of those dual exhaust pipes. It was music to my ears. I definitely missed my calling; should’ve done something seriously profound for a girl and cars.

Traffic is clear and it’s a go. I put a little pressure on the pedal, seriously just a little and that sucker peeled out. I was in love. One 1989 Chevy Z24 sold. It had a new home. Mine. Picked her up the next day bright and early and she was my pride and joy. Talk about “no one puts baby in the corner”, I could have written that line. And don’t you dare touch her; you put a smidgen of so much as a finger print on her and we’re gonna be rolling in the grass. Yep, this Georgia girl may be able to clean up all nice a proper, but I definitely know where my inner red neck is and when to bring her out.

Cutting to the chase, the poor dummy ex-boyfriend (as in male, man, guy) argued I was a girl and didn’t know how to check the oil much less add it. I should really just accept I knew better so the fault lies with me. It was him after all; the lawn man who put car engine oil in the lawnmower. Dead as a door nail. I swear I never laughed so hard. Well, that’s not true. He gave me many moments of “no you di’int!” Maybe this was a karma moment for me?

What person, male or female, doesn’t confirm what they have in their hand before they pour it into a car engine? I know one, and I lay odds he’ll never do it again. But seriously, learn your lessons on your own time and dime.

Anyway, thankfully his best friend knew more than a thing or two about cars, told me what to do and I TOOK IT from there. The ex, however, he still gets called out on it. Thankfully, for the dummy, he didn’t seize the engine and I didn’t have to park baby in the corner; and he never put transmission fluid into anything where it didn’t belong again. Thankfully, for me I didn’t have to sell my car; I thought for sure I’d be looking for companies that buy dead cars, but nope. I drove that sucker until she’d only go in reverse. Now that was a fun drive home. Eh, this single mom wasn’t about to pay for a tow. The kids were expensive things, ugh I mean they came first and if I could save a buck, I saved a buck. I just backed it all the way home. Maybe I’ll tell you about that next.

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